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So long, and thanks for all the fish!

The MLG Providence Awards

MLG Pro Circuit LogoProvidence has ended, much to my dismay. The event was a feast, every course filled with bitter defeats and sweet victories. Napkins have been folded, dishes have been washed, and a young Korean has emerged $50K richer. Leenock wasn’t the only victor, though. For CEO Sundance DiGiovanni, the conclusion of Providence marks a year of explosive growth for Major League Gaming.

The momentum they have going in to season 2 will be tremendous.

I was going to write a typical, dull recap article. One which highlighted Leenock’s spectacular 34-4 run, or HayprO’s surprising top 8 finish, or the unexpected success of Vile’s Illusion or Reign’s Artist. I may have also mentioned Destiny’s disappointing loses, or Major’s new tournament moniker, or Gatored’s impressive victory vs Ganzi. Then it occurred to me that everyone else is going to cover all of that, so why not have some fun instead?

Thus it is without further adieu that I present Gosu.com’s MLG Providence Awards. A collection of highly coveted honors earned by only the most deserving competitors.

MLG Providence Award

The “So Close it Hurts” Award

And the Winner is… Nikoras

Nikoras, oh Nikoras, how close you were to upsetting Puzzle on the main stage. Your innovative sentry use had djWheat near tears. You have the mind of a true Protoss, and a deep understanding of the micro race. Someday, perhaps with enough practice, your hands may keep up.

Honorable Mention: Slush, for his near victory against NesTea in game one.

The “All Bark” Award

And the Winner is… Dong Rae Gu

Before the winner’s bracket finals, DRG dismissed his Swedish teammate with a smirk on his face that would embarrass the snidest of trolls. Naniwa returned the insult by staring at him with his cold, dead eyes. What ensued was a ravaging the likes of which I haven’t seen since Portugal faced North Korea in the world cup. Don’t get me wrong, DRG is a fantastic player. He should’ve just known better. When Naniwa plays angry it’s like something out of one of Werner Herzog’s more nihilistic diatribes.

The “It Happens to a lot of Guys” Award

And the Winner is… IdrA

I play Zerg; so like any who plays this race, I have a certain admiration for IdrA. His deep understanding of macro and mechanics make me wonder why Blizzard hasn’t renamed some ultra level of computer difficulty after him. But damn it, Greg, it’s really hard to root for you when you simply refuse to acknowledge the possibility that you aren’t playing against yourself. Other players can make macro mistakes. You being down a few drones and lings, while disadvatageous, does not mean the game is over. Leenock could’ve messed up. He could’ve run 12 lings into a baneling, he could’ve blown up his own hatchery with siege tanks, his extra lings could’ve been hallucinations. Are these things unlikely? Sure. But you don’t know unless you play it out.

The “That Couldn’t Possibly Wor-OH MY GOD!” Award

And the Winner is… Hero’s Archon Toilet

Liquid’s Hero is a true Protoss. He understands that his race is not about perfect macro or flawless resource allocation. They’re about crazy freakin’ abilities and having the finger dexterity to use them.  When Ret popped a dozen or so Brood Lords and began slowly marching across the map with a stampede of supporting units, most players would’ve probably laid back and accepted the inevitable. Not so for Hero, for he had produced the mother of all Protoss units. With a flash of his hand and a flick of his wrist, he sucked Ret’s army into a deadly trap with his powerful Archons. Upon release from the vortex, the once fearsome Zerg army was vaporized in seconds. GG.

Honorable Mention: Leenock, for going Sky Zerg after rushing Hive vs MVP. How do you like them apples?

The “I Should’ve been Third” Award

And the Winner is… HuK

HuK placed 5th, yet his two loses were to the eventual winner and eventual runner up. It doesn’t seem like that big a deal until you note that third place would’ve doubled his prize money. I don’t have much else to say aside from that’s a bummer.

The “Most Bittersweet Joke” Award

And the Winner is… Rob Simpson

“Yo momma ship is so fat, we couldn’t fit her in the expansion.” Ha ha ha, :(

Honorable Mention: Artosis, for “Anything is Protossable!” It should be noted that the winning joke invalidates this one. 

The “I Shouldn’t be Alive” Award

And the Winner is… Leenock

No, I’m not talking about the fact that he won the tournament. I’m talking about his game 1 comeback vs BoxeR. He lost his hatchery to early 2 rax pressure and BoxeR threw up a third right around when he was just re-establishing his natural. I literally tweeted “If Leenock wins this game I will eat my own shoe.” Guess I better start boiling some water…

Honorable Mention: HayprO, for fighting his way to a 7th place finish. Well done, sir.

and finally, because I have to…

The “Cutest Cheeks” Award

And the Winner is… LosirA

Honorable Mention: Leenock


Did I leave any out? Post your own awards below.

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